My Journal from April 30, 2015

Recently I feel I have been running into intense feelings I haven’t felt earlier. I have been feeling really angry and really sad and can’t stop crying at times. As I’ve been learning with my counselor/mentor to allow myself to feel those things. The only way to get through this is letting myself feel all I need to feel and to allow God to be “Emmanuel” to me. I have felt so much freedom to pour everything out and invite God to speak and to comfort me at the same time. God cares about helping us heal but he also cares about being with us in the midst of everything. Healing doesn’t always come from taking away something but sometimes it is found in just letting God comfort you in your pain.

Hello world!

I recently lost my husband to stage 4 colon cancer on August 13, 2014 at 29 years old. I wanted to start this blog to encourage and to share with others a little bit of our story and what I have learned and continue to learn. Being a widow and caring for my almost 3 year old son is quite a challenge at times. I am blessed to have a great community, church, counselor/mentor,  and freedom to be brutally honest with all my ups and downs with all that I feel with Jesus. Walking this with Jesus has become less of a chore or duty but more of a relationship and walking this together.

This picture was taken a few weeks before my husband died: August 2014
This picture was taken a few weeks before my husband died: August 2014